Candy Hearts
by nrrg
Summary: It's Valentine's Day. Yuki throws Shuichi out of his apartment yet again. Hiro finds a sobbing Shuichi in the street and takes him home. He never planned to confess what he's been meaning to for so long. [HiroXShu] Oneshot


A/N: Well, this is the 1st fic I've posted. It's a much revised version of something I wrote way back in February at Valentine's Day. (Yes, I am aware that it's August now!) Anyways; know before you start reading that I'm very nervous about posting this. It may seem stupid, but it's true. This is because I'm very self-critical, and am afraid that I'll get a bunch of bad reviews, or none at all. Before I go, I would like to say a very special thank you to the people who have been trying to get me to post this fic from the beginning. Thank you loveacrosstime for all your encouragement and support all along, and the help of your beta skillz. Another thanks goes to -ashimaru- for also being a wonderful and encouraging friend to me. Last, but not least, I'd like to thank my very own Hiro-chan (you know who you are) who helped me come up with the idea for this fic in the first place. I hope you like how it turned out. Sorry for the extra long author's note. Constructive criticism is welcomed, but remember, no flames! R&R!

Disclaimer: Ok, I'll make it quick: Gravitation belongs to Maki Murakami. I don't own it nor will I ever.

_italics_ thoughts **bold** flashbacks

OoOoO

Candy Hearts

_ Why did it have to turn out like this? And on today of all days too. All I wanted was to show him on this special day how much he means to me. My dear Yuki, I love him so much, why must he be so cruel to me? Why did I have to go and piss him off when perhaps he might have been in a good (and possibly romantic) enough mood to show me some affection later on. Maybe even affection in another form than just sex, something like those three little words I've been waiting to hear from him for so long… My salty tears mingle with the pouring rain. I'd yet again proved myself nothing but an annoyance, a waste of his time, and so he'd done what he'd done so many times before. This time, however, it seemed to hurt worse. Maybe that's because today is Valentine's Day._

** He'd told me time and time again to go away, to find something else to do, to shut the hell up, and get out of his face. He'd been locked up in his study now for nearly a week, and I'd been good about it. After the first twenty-four hours I'd left him alone, only briefly sticking my pink-haired head through the door to shout a "YUKI, I'M HOME!!!" whenever I returned from work. A few days ago K brought a huge bag of many colored candy hearts to the studio for us. He said it was a custom in America to eat these things on Valentine's Day because of the messages they had written on them. This morning, before he'd woken up, I'd filled a little dish of the candies for Yuki, and put them on his desk next to his precious laptop with a note that said "Happy Valentine's Day sweetie!!" on it. As I left work, I was bursting with energy and love, and of course had forgotten all about my promise to leave my lover alone today. I practically threw myself at his study door, and I was in mid-glomp when a small object hurtled through the air and hit me between the eyes. I crashed to the floor.**

** "Yuuukkkiii, what did you do that for? That was meeaan!" I whined. He didn't look up. Still pouting, I crawled over to a small green object lying on the rug beside his chair. My heart leapt with joy. My lover had just thrown a candy heart at me! A little green candy heart! I suppressed a squeal of joy. Yuki was playing with me, and knowing him, the heart probably said something very suggestive. My wish had come true! Grinning, I turned the heart over. My smile crumpled, and all the happiness rushed out of me like a popped balloon. In all capital bright pink letters, the heart read "GET LOST".**

** "Happy Valentine's Day to you too, there's your present. Happy?" he muttered without looking up from typing. I was speechless. I just sat there, hot tears gathering at the corners of my eyes, unable to move. Yuki swiveled his chair to look at me, his golden eyes menacing.**

** "Well, what are you waiting for? Get out!" my lover snapped. I jumped up and ran.**

I'm still running. My lungs feel strained and my legs ache. Rain and tears are blurring my vision. I can barely see anything. My foot slips on the wet sidewalk, causing me to collide with someone. The next thing I know the two of us are falling. We tumble roughly to the ground in a tangle of limbs, and I feel something relatively heavy land on top of me.

"Itai…" I moan softly as I struggle to open my eyes. A familiar voice is calling my name. Thick, warm liquid dribbles down my face. _Shit. I'm bleeding._ It's flowing from my nose, which is throbbing terribly. My head is spinning from the fall, and my chest hurts from where I was landed on. I cough and open my eyes. They meet a pair of concerned looking blue ones. As my vision clears, I realize those eyes belong to none other than my best friend Hiro. He's crouched down next to me, bending over so our faces are nearly touching. I sit up. He places a light hand behind my head.

"Take it easy Shu, your nose is bleeding all over the place. How do you feel?" he asks.

"I…I…think I'm ok…" I reply, still a bit dazed. The dizziness hasn't completely faded, not to mention that my heart's still aching from what happened with Yuki.

"Sorry I landed on you," he says sheepishly.

"That's ok," I say. "It's my fault for not looking where I was going. I should have been more careful. You're ok, right?" I ask him.

"Yeah, I'm fine, it's you I'm worried about," he says.

"I already told you, I'm fine!" I answer with a little more edge than intended.

"Well if you're so fine, than why were you sobbing so hard when you were running?" he questions. I bite my lip, willing myself not to start crying again. His face softens.

"Come on, Shu, let's get you back to my place so you can get cleaned up." he says gently. He pulls me up, but I slump against him. He slips an arm around my waist to support me. I smile weakly at him, and he smiles back.

We'll talk later, ok?" he says. I nod, grateful for his closeness and sympathy. He always seems to know what's best.

Hiro leads me several blocks downtown to his apartment. It's in a tall grayish building made of stone. It's not nearly as nice as Yuki's, of course, but has a pleasant, home-like feel to it. Probably that's because I've been there so many times. No matter how many times I go back there, it always seems the same. The same faded couch, chairs, and coffee table. The same tiny, messy kitchen. The same neat bedroom with the single bed, and his guitar and amp in the corner. The same sweet smell that reminds me of hot chocolate. I love the familiarity of it all. It comforts me like a warm embrace. We sit down on his bed, and Hiro looks closely at my nose.

"The bleeding's stopped, that's good. How does it feel?" he asks.

"It hurts a bit," I say. "But not too bad. I don't think it's broken."

"I think you'll be fine," he agrees. "Is your head all right?" I nod.

"It's fine."

"No bumps?" he asks.

"Nope."

"Good." He walks over to a small chest of drawers, and tosses a red undershirt to me.

"Here, go put this on. You left it here a couple weeks ago. There's blood all over your shirt. You might wanna clean yourself up a bit too," he tells me. Catching the shirt, I stand up, and walk to the bathroom.

The bathroom, like everything else in the apartment, is compact, but not cramped. I study my face in the mirror above the sink. Big, sorrowful, violet eyes like those of a neglected child, and a tearful, slightly bloodstained face stares back at me. I turn away. _Is that really what I look like? I look so…so lost. Is that what I am without him, just a stray? Without a home, without happiness, without love?_ I sigh and begin to wash the dried blood and tearstains off my face. I peel off my wet, bloody shirt, and change into the fresh, dry one. Finally I emerge from the bathroom. I'm exhausted, cold, sore, and heartbroken. Hiro's bed has never looked so inviting. I let myself fall towards it gratefully. I land on it with a soft thud, and just lie there, until I hear footsteps. Raising my head slightly, I see Hiro looking down at me. I sit up, and burrow under the thick covers of his bed. He tucks them around me like he would to a small child, and sits on the edge of the bed, one arm around the lump that is the rest of my body, the other bracing himself from falling.

"Why do you let him do this to you, Shu?" he asks gently. I don't even need to ask whom Hiro's talking about.

"'Cause I love him," I mumble into the thick sheets. He sighs.

"You're like a little puppy, you know that? Always faithful and loving to your owner no matter how many times he beats you." I frown.

"Yuki doesn't own me, Hiro," I say.

"Then why do you act like he does?" he asks.

"I do not!" I retort.

"Do too."

"Do not!"

"Do too."

"Do not!"

"Do too."

"Shut up Hiro."

"Hey, don't be mad at me. All I'm trying to do is help." There is an awkward pause, and I begin to feel slightly guilty.

_ I've snapped at him all day for being concerned about me. He's right; he's only trying to help. He only ever tries to help. _

"Sorry."

"So-kay," he shrugs. We're both silent for a while. Finally, I speak.

"I just wanna be loved, Hiro. Is that too much to ask of him? Is it because of Kitazawa? Is it because I'm too loud and annoying? Is it just because I'm not good enough for him?" I question out loud. Hiro shakes his head, his long hair swishing softly from side to side against my face. The expression on his face is a mix of anger and sadness.

"Shuichi, why do you always blame yourself for these things? Ever since you met Yuki-san, he's been like this. I highly doubt that he would change for anyone. It's just the way he is. That's not your fault. If anyone's, it's his own for letting what Kitazawa did to him make him this way," he says. "However, Yuki is not the only person in this world who can love you. There are many others who would die to take his place."

"I know, I know! But I only want Yuki!" I whine, trying to ignore the fact that I sound like a pouty, spoiled little kid.

"Yes, Shu, I know that, but is he who you really need?" he responds. Then, before I have time to properly think about those words, I feel a pair of lips brush up against mine. They are soft, and silky, and gentle. It almost seems like they are brand new, and have been waiting for just this moment. Waiting for me. The kiss itself is tender and light. I try to count the number of times Yuki has kissed me like this, but am so caught up in the moment, I can't. It couldn't have been more than about ten. His kisses are fierce, passionate, and almost always involve tongue. Lots of tongue. Suddenly I realize something; Yuki isn't kissing me. Yuki is at home in his apartment probably writing. And then it sinks in; this isn't Yuki, it's Hiro.

With a loud squeal of surprise, I rip my lips away, shrinking back and pressing myself up against the wall.

"What the hell was that for?!" I cry. My face feels like it's on fire, my heart is pounding, and my eyes are wide with shock. "Well?" I demand shakily.

"Shuichi," he says softly. "Now do you understand? Do you understand why it hurts me so much to see how Yuki treats you most of the time? Why I always try to be so happy for you when he's kinder to you? You are the reason why I always come back to Bad Luck. The reason why even if I wanted to I could never leave for good. Because I want to be with you. I want to protect you. You mean so much to me, and not just as a friend. Because I love you."

"But Hiro," I protest. "You can't fall in love with me! I'm your best friend!"

"You can't choose who you fall in love with," he replies, with a sad smile, and I realize that I've heard those words before.

"I'm in love with Yuki though, and you're supposed to be in love with Ayaka! What are you gonna tell her? And…and Yuki has my heart, and you can't have it!" I cry, and burst into tears again.

"Shuichi," he says softly. "I'm sorry."

"Oh shut up, you are not."

"Not for loving you, but that me loving you makes you so upset. Come here."

"Don't touch me!" I snap as best I can, jerking away. However, he doesn't listen, and instead, pulls me into his arms. There is no use in resisting now. Hiro has no intension of letting me go. I surrender, wrapping my arms around his neck, and burying my face in his auburn hair. He holds me close as sobs rack my small form. Gently, he strokes my hair, and slowly I feel my anger melting away, replaced with an overwhelming feeling of vulnerability and emptiness. This is what I hate most about Hiro; it's somehow impossible to stay mad at him for very long. This makes me cling to him, and cry even harder.

"Sssh, sshh, it's ok, Shu, it's ok," he whispers to me. I flinch as I feel a hand caress my cheek. Though his touch is soft, his fingers are rough and calloused from years of plucking the strings of his guitar and gripping the handlebars of his motorcycle. They are not hands like Yuki's. My lover's hands are shaped for pleasure, Hiro's for work. Through my tears I can see that his deep blue eyes are slightly damp too. My tight grip around his neck loosens, so it's no longer a stranglehold, and I let my head slide down to rest in the crook between his neck and shoulder. He holds me tenderly. Not squeezing, but not carelessly loose either. I let my eyes close. I know it's a mistake, but I can't help myself. He is so soft, so warm…

OoOoO

I feel a hand resting on my shoulder, gently shaking me.

"Shu! Oi, Shu! Shuichi, wake up!"

"Nnnmf…" I manage to mumble, my head rising slowly from Hiro's lap, which has been serving as my pillow.

"I fell asleep, didn't I?"

"Yeah, I think you cried yourself to sleep. You weren't out for very long though," he replies. I nod.

"So," he asks. "Am I forgiven then?" I look up into his eyes. _The same eyes that were wet with tears only a few hours ago. _

"Yes," I answer, placing one hand on his cheek.

"S…Shuichi?" I giggle softly at the expression on his face, placing my other hand the same way.

"Shu, don't tease me…" he warns, his voice low. My laughter stops, and brings my face a few inches closer to his.

"Alright, you asked for it," Hiro says, and the distance between our faces disappears. I close my eyes as our lips touch. Breathing a little sigh of pleasure, I let my lips part just the tiniest bit, wondering whether or not he'll take the invitation. He does without hesitation. At first it's very strange having Hiro's tongue in my mouth, but before long I become used to it, and tentatively let mine touch his. He tastes like cinnamon and sugar; sweet, but with a bit of spice. It's a nice taste. _What do I taste like to him? Strawberry Pocky probably._ A light hand brushing against the skin of my chest startles me from my thoughts. Ignoring the fact that it feels so nice, I shyly bring my hands up to his shoulders and give him a gentle push away. This has gone farther than I intended. He responds somewhat reluctantly.

Our faces are both flushed a light shade of crimson as we pull away. I try not to look him in the eye, and instead concentrate on breathing.

"Shuichi," Hiro asks once he's recovered enough breath and composure. "Why did you do that?" My blush deepens.

"Well…I, you know…just kinda…thought that you deserved…" I trail off.

"That I deserved what?"

"That you deserved a proper kiss. And so I gave you one, 'cause…'cause the first one didn't count," I finish, meeting his eyes now. He grins, and gives me an affectionate squeeze. I allow myself to smile a little too.

"Thanks," he whispers, and gives me a quick peck on the cheek. This makes my subsiding blush flare up all over again.

"You're welcome," I mumble back, trying my best to hide my reddish face from him.

"You're so cute!" he says, ruffling my pink hair.

"Hiiiroo! Cut it out!" I whine. He laughs.

"Well, I suppose I should go make some dinner. You must be getting hungry, and I assume you won't be going back to Yuki-san's tonight."

"Do you think after what's just happened I want to stay the night with you? How do I know you won't try to crawl in bed with me?" I respond somewhat warily.

"Shuichi, believe me, if I was gonna do that, I would have done it a long time ago. And plus, my bed doesn't even have enough room for two people. Unless of course someone lies on top of the other…" At that I grab a pillow from beside me and hit him over the head with it.

"Oww! Stop it!"

"No! I'm bashing those lusty thoughts out of your mind!" I laugh, and after a final hit throw the pillow on the ground. Hiro sits up and rubs his head. His hair falls in front of his face, and I brush it back into place. He smiles lopsidedly at me.

"That hurt, Shu. I think you owe me a kiss." I sigh. My bashing was completely ineffective.

"If I give you one last kiss will you stop being so horny and go back to being the normal Hiro?" I ask.

"Yes," he says. "And, I'll make you dinner. I'll even throw in some Pocky for some tongue!" I just roll my eyes, then lean over and place a soft kiss on his lips. _I'm almost used to kissing him now. Well, if I ever need practice, I'll know just where to come._ I realize that in my distraction, his tongue has slipped into my mouth, and is massaging mine. It's a bit startling at first, but I don't pull away. He slides his arms around my waist, and I let my fingers tangle in his long hair. Suddenly my head begins to swim. _Shit! I almost forgot to breathe!_ Quickly I pull away, panting.

"I...think I…deserve more…than just…Pocky," I manage to choke out.

"Oh, don't worry, I'll think of something!" Hiro says, winking at me. He slides off the couch and stands up. Before he can start walking in the direction of the kitchen, I grab the corner of his shirt.

"Hiro?"

"Hmm? What's up?"

"Y…You won't tell anyone about this, will you?" I ask, a hint of nervousness in my voice. He looks softly at me.

"No, Shuichi, I won't tell anyone. Who would I tell anyways? Fujisaki?" he says with a smirk. "But seriously, I promise I won't tell anyone. It'll just be our little secret."

"Just a couple kisses between friends, right?"

"Right," he nods. "I'm gonna go make dinner now, ok?"

"Ok."

"And Shuichi?"

"What?"

"Happy Valentine's Day." My face breaks into a wide grin.

"Happy Valentine's Day to you too, Hiro," I reply as he walks into the kitchen. He turns and smiles back at me.

_So I guess it hasn't been such a bad Valentine's Day after all. A bit strange, but not really in a bad way. And no shortage of kisses either. If it'd been up to Hiro, we would probably still be on his couch. Or possibly on the floor by this time… I never would have expected that a day that started out so badly could end the way this one is, and it isn't even over. After all, Hiro still has to make up for almost suffocating me. I'm getting the feeling that this is going to be an interesting night…_

Onwari


End file.
